Doctor x Doctor
by lightningpelt
Summary: The series is all about him. What a lovely dream. Oneshot


**(A/N) Leorio is underappreciated. **

**Any ooc-ness is intended. Any medical errors are intended. **

**No pairings. Any innuendos used only for the purposes of humor. **

**Posted in celebration: I started watching the brandy new HxH anime today! Judging from the first episode, it's better than the first one (more true to the manga ^^), although I did like the old one. **

**I don't own any of the characters. **

"Geez," the teen huffed, stretching high above his head. "Long, busy day…" Shaking his head shortly, he closed a door behind him, emerging into a waiting room. "I'm ready to go home, how 'bout you?"

His receptionist scoffed slightly. "It is closing time."

The teen smiled. "Yeah, I think we could both use some rest. Wanna do something before we go home?"

The receptionist huffed, knowing exactly what he meant. "I am underage. So are you, if I recall."

"Not in this world," the teen said haughtily. "Here, _I _make _all _the rules." Seeming to give this some thought, the young doctor squinted at his receptionist. "Speaking of which… I think _you_ should be a _girl_!"

"Leorio!" the other snapped, standing up in indignation. Leorio laughed.

"I'm kidding," he said easily. "Relax, Kurapika. I'm _kidding_."

"You should not kid about such things!" the blonde boy said, his voice clipped with annoyance.

"Lighten up," Leorio insisted, holding the office door open for his friend, but Kurapika only huffed.

"After you."

"No, after you."

"I'm not a girl! After _you_!"

"Well neither am I, and I'm already holding the door!"

This argument, much to the amusement of passersby, went on for about half a minute. It ended when Leorio slammed the door crossly, catching Kurapika's foot and causing the other to throw the pen-holder (grabbed from the reception desk) at his head. This ended with both of them outside, neither quite sure who had come out first.

"Hey guys!"

The call distracted both of them, preventing the argument from breaking out again. The two children approaching were smiling, one comically wide and the other just enough to appear irresistibly adorable. The former reached them first.

"So how was your guy's day?" he asked excitedly. "Cure a lot of people?"

"That I did," Leorio said with a smile. "32 today."

"A new record," the other commented, coming up behind first. "School was as boring as ever. Wish _we _had an exciting life like _yours_."

"Well," Leorio chuckled, "maybe you'll grow up to be Hunters or somethin. You two keep studying hard, and anything's possible!"

"You're right!" the first chirped excitedly, his grin growing larger. "I'm gonna be a Hunter!"

"Yeah, me too!" the other echoed.

"So Gon, Killua," Kurapika began, naming the two of them, "how _was _school today?"

"Boring!" Gon echoed Killua's earlier sentiment. "All we did was learn _math_!"

"Don't lie," the blonde said, a trace of disapproval in his voice. Reaching forward, he plucked a leaf from Gon's spiky hair. "You didn't even go to school today, did you?"

Gon turned red, and Killua elbowed him from the side. "I told you that you were a rotten liar!" the white haired boy said teasingly.

"Aw, let it go," Leorio said, laying a hand on Kurapika's shoulder. "If they're going to be Hunters, math isn't important."

"That's not the point," Kurapika began, but knew it was a losing battle. When he fell silent, the foursome started down the street toward home.

"By the way, we're out of chocolate," Killua said casually, and Kurapika stopped walking.

"I just bought more yesterday!" the blonde exclaimed.

"And I _ate _it," Killua replied calmly.

"I'm not going to the store again!" Kurapika insisted angrily.

"Sorry, Kurapika, but I was gonna ask you anyway," Leorio said sheepishly. "We don't have any food left, practically."

"I bought more _yesterday_," Kurapika insisted stubbornly. "You can't have eaten it _all_."

"Sorry!" Gon said sincerely. "We're really, really sorry!"

Without another word (only a heavy sigh) Kurapika veered off from the others, in the direction of the store. Leorio and Killua snickered, while Gon looked sincerely sorry.

"Help! Somebody help me, please!"

The shriek broke the silence, and the trio looked sharply over. They saw, just a few feet from them, a delicate-looking young woman lying on her back, her ample chest heaving. Another girl stood over her, calling desperately for help. Leorio didn't hesitate.

"Back away, Miss," he said calmly. "I'm a doctor."

"Oh thank goodness!" the girl exclaimed. "My friend… she collapsed!"

Leorio crouched down, resting one hand on the woman's breastbone. "Cardiac arrest," he said shortly, "I'll have to resuscitate her." Without another word he bent forward, pressing his lips to the girl's in an obviously above-board CPR maneuver.

This continued, with a small crowd of onlookers soon gathering, for about a minute. Finally, the girl drew a deep breath, spluttering and coughing. Then, as she blinked up at her apparent savior, she threw her arms around Leorio's neck.

"Oh thank you!" she blubbered, pressing her face into his neck. "I thought I was going to die!"

"Oh, I thought she would die!" the girl's friend cried, flinging herself down onto Leorio as well.

The crowd began to applaud, including, of course, Gon and Killua. Leorio made some humble comments, but didn't try too hard to divert the attention on him. He accepted, without too much fuss, the adoring words and kisses from the two girls. It took a good 15 minutes for the crowd to disperse, and Leorio ended up leaving with both the girls' phone numbers and the numbers of half a dozen girls out of the crowd.

"That was amazing!" Gon exclaimed, not seeming to take a breath all the way home. "Gosh, Leorio! You're so awesome! Nobody's as cool as you!"

"Yeah," Killua agreed. "You shouldn't have to stay in a small town like this! You should totally go to a big city! You could make it in York New, I'll bet!"

"Nah, I like it here," Leorio answered easily. "Small town values and all that… a bit of anonymity."

"It's Doctor Leorio!"

"Oh Doctor, look over here!"

A pair of passing girls squealed, and Leorio smiled obligingly in their direction.

"Yes," he continued, "I don't want to be a big star."

"Leorio!"

"Eeee! Oh, I'm going to faint!"

This new set of girls swooned visibly, one partially supporting the other, as Leorio smiled indulgently.

Upon reaching Leorio's house (where the other three were staying as well), the trio pushed inside. Kurapika, by some miracle, had made it home first, and was already stationed at the stove, and the scent of the cooking steaks filled the house.

"Welcome home," the blonde called indulgently, and Leorio grinned.

"Good to be back,_ honey_." He often made fun of the other boy for his apparent 'motherly' role. This, of course, only got a spatula thrown at his head, but he was used to dodging such items.

"You got more chocolate?" Killua asked eagerly, rooting around in the various bags on the counter.

Kurapika sighed heavily. "I would appreciate it if _someone_ would _at least _help me put the food away."

"I'll do it!" Gon volunteered quickly, snatching a bag out from under Killua. This, of course, ignited a scuffled between the two boys, while Kurapika dodged around them expertly without releasing his grip on the skillet handle.

Leorio had settled on the couch, content to watch the scene playing out. Flipping on the news, he saw a replay of his daily heroics; it was on four different stations. Sighing and flicking the TV off, he picked up the nearest magazine, licking his lips eagerly.

"Diner's ready!" Kurapika called, seeming to have forgotten his annoyance at his domestic role. It only took a few moments for the three others to crowd around the table, eager.

"Thanks, Peeks," Leorio said shortly, voicing the nickname that he often used in his own head. "Itadaki-"

"_Peeks_?" the other asked coldly, and Leorio froze, realizing that he had spoken out loud.

"Kurapika… Peeks… it works," Killua decided, tearing into the steak on his plate without giving the situation any more thought.

"That's right!" Leorio said, over his momentary embarrassment. "It's a perfectly viable nickname! 'Kurapika' is just too darn long!"

The Kurta's eyes glowed with the beginnings of scarlet. "I _will not _be called that, Reolio."

"Ouch. Burn," muttered Killua, who was apparently paying attention after all.

"G-guys…" Gon began, obviously trying to calm the situation.

"You really had to start?" Leorio asked angrily. "Shall we take it outside?"

"After _you_," Kurapika said with a sniff.

"Don't star this again!" Leorio shouted, and suddenly the knives and swords were drawn right there at the dinner table.

"G-guys!" Gon tried again, but went unheard.

"You know what?" Leorio asked hotly. "I think you need to be a _girl_. A nice, domesticated _girl_! One who can just be my receptionist and take care of us and not complain about it!"

That was how Kurapika found himself turned into a female.

"What did you do?" he/she screeched, staring down in shock and alarm at the things on his/her chest that defiantly _had not _been there before.

"U-uh…" Leorio stammered, taking a step backwards. "I-I didn't th-think that would a-actually w-work…!"

"It's _your_ dream, you moron!" Kurapika snapped furiously. "What did you think would happen?"

"M-my… dream?" the later repeated, relatively confused.

"You didn't think this was reality, did you?" Killua asked curiously, mouth half full. "_Gon and I _are the _real _stars, not you. This is just your jealous fantasy."

"No need to be so mean about it!" Gon said hurriedly. "A-and we're not r-really the stars…"

"Yes we are," Killua scoffed. "Kurapika's got a bigger role, too. _And _more fans. We've _all _got more fans."

The assassin might have said more, but Gon pounced on him.

Leorio turned, distraught, toward Kurapika (still very much a girl). "Is this… true?"

Kurapika sighed. "Leorio… we love you, really… but the series is called 'Hunter x Hunter,' not 'Doctor x Doctor.' You are… as you say… a 'major supporting character.'"

"This can't be true," the doctor moaned, slumping to the ground. Kurapika crouched beside him, laying a hand on his shoulder.

"You're unconscious right now," the Kurta continued to explain. "Remember? You… ehem… tripped over Killua's skateboard. I think it's time for you to wake up."

"But I don't wanna!" Leorio said defiantly. "I… I like it here!"

"I know," Kurapika said soothingly. "Hey, I think my counterpart is calling you." Then, the Kurta smiled. "Be sure not to call _him_ 'Peeks,' or suggest he turn into a girl. It might lead to some trouble."

… … …

… … …

… … …

"…rio…? …Leorio…? Leorio? Leorio?"

The medical student slowly became aware of the voice calling to him. Then he felt the pressure on his shoulders as he was shaken, gently but insistently. Forcing his eyes open, he found Kurapika's worried face an inch from his own.

The Kurta breathed a heavy sigh of relief, sitting back. "Heavens, we thought you'd killed yourself!"

"… You're not a girl…" was the first thing out of Leorio's mouth, which he instantly regretted.

Kurapika's eyes narrowed severely. "_What_?"

Shaking his head, the medical student held up his hands. "N-nothing… j-just a really, really weird dream."

His Kurta friend glared accusingly at him for a moment, and then seemed to give up. "I don't want to hear about it."

And so Leorio sighed, getting up and resigning to his fate as a major supporting character.

But it had been a glorious dream, while it was lasted. And sometimes, late at night, lying awake, he would mutter, "'Doctor x Doctor…' it kinda does have a nice ring to it…"

THE END

**(A/N) That was fun. Hope you enjoyed as much as I did. Reviews make me very happy. :D **


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